The Stallion
Hold on to your seatbelts, Country and Western fans! The Stallion (we've started already btw) has literally leaped or jumped or whatever horses do out of the wooden fenced paddock of country blues where it was being tamed for years by its two tamers, ALASTAIR MACKINVEN and BEN WALLERS from rock band COUNTRY TEASERS - think Bert & Ernie from "Rancho Deluxe" starring Harry Dean Stanton (Alastair) and Charles Laughton (Ben) - into the highly polished metal spaceship of ... wait for it ... drumroll ... not yet ... ok Now, Prog Rock! Kick drum cymbal-hit! The Stallion cut its teeth on performing to out-of-it-on-drugs City Yuppies (the original kind of Yuppies, not so much the gentrification yuppies with the beards and drainpipes, more like the actual City American Psycho types) in the early Noughties. Carter Family, Leonard Cohen, Bob Dylan, Carter Family: you name it! Non-playing third member and manager of the band, keyboardist Wrick Rite takes up the story: "But me and the guys, we got tired you know? So tired. So we retired, so tired, from the Country open mic scene and withdrew, declared, retired if you will to the studio. 3 years later: Hey Presto! Drumroll, pause, build-up, kick drum, cymbal crash: Pink Floyd The Wall, if you please sir! All day long! All 4 sides AND MORE! There should be a sticker on this heavyweight double album," continued the ailing, sacked, disgraced LSD casualty from his deathbed, ignoring our requests to wrap the press release up quickly, "which says 'GREAT BUY, CRUEL WORLD!' because at $19.99 or whatever we're charging, it represents INCREDIBLE value. Take yours to the checkout now!"
If like many country & western fans across Europe, the USA and 'Britain' you've been waiting for a new Country Teasers album, since like 2006 or whatever, we here at The Stallion HQ also known as The Hit Factory confidently assure you that you might as well take this massive achievement as 5 times the compensation you deserve. To quote inaccurately the cop who shuts the jailcell gate on Woody Allen's character in "Deconstructing Harry" : let me give you some advice : YOU'RE IN DEEP SHIT.
